HOLLA AT YA LAVA, BOYYYYY! Or; an end of the year wrap up- Part 1.

2011.

My initial reaction is to do the whole "Good riddance, eff off 2011 and take all of your nasty baggage with you" blog.  And there will be a fair amount of that.  Actually, lets just get rid of that right now, first thing.  Until we clear that out we can't get to the real meat of what happened this year.

Divorce.Depression.PlummetingSelfWorth.Depression.Rejection.PlummetingSelfImage.Depression.BeingUsed.Rejection.UsingPeople.Uprooting.Depression.SelfCenteredAndEgomaniacal.BeingMean.Depression.Depression.Depression.Rejection.

never let your fear decide your fate.

If there is one thing that has become completely clear this year it is that you have to look in between the calamities, catastrophes and disasters and find the rebirth, as contrived as that sounds.

This year I became a vegan.  Taking control of my diet replaced the control that I was lacking over other parts of my life.  As an unexpected side effect I have finally been able to declare independence from my scale and I don't feel my neck immediately after eating something to see if I've grown any extra chins anymore either. I still don't love myself 100% of the time, but I'm at peace with my body the most that I have ever been.  Something about knowing I'm doing my small part to lessen the blow of the staggering level animal suffering and environmental damage that is caused by the animal production industry helps with that too, I suspect. 

I tried EFT this year, which freed me from an emotionally wrecking relationship, allowed me to think creatively again and helped to bring my skating into a new era of less fear and more risks.  Now I'm seeing clearly, I may not have definite goals but I'm learning how to dream again.  I'm not afraid of thinking beyond the next few hours.  I'm seeing the things I need to do to feel at peace with myself and my reality and making ways to put those things into action.
I'm inspired.

This year was tough, but I think I was tougher.

I LAVA that nothing I endured wasn't done so without a lesson or two learned.  Nothing was actually lost, except maybe some dignity when my mom would walk in on me crying on the floor to Taylor Swift.

2011, thanks for being a teacher.

2012 Resolutions.  Part 2.